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So this month I have not yet received funds and there has not been payment for the mortgage.

Special thanks to attorney number one who apparently submitted a temporary order over a year ago that did not (how this could happen I have no idea) include who pays the mortgage and several other bills.

Not sure I can say this here so mods I will delete if you ask but praying for a miracle.

Did talk with the lender and they have no covid programs and no way to modify without husband's participation.

File for an emergency order.

Cat

Thanks for the suggestion!

I will see if the court has this form.

And to be clear, my wh did not deposit has half of the mortgage in the joint account this month. I suspect that this was strategic on his part.

THis decision to not divide even one single piece of our marital property or stuff has consumed another series of retainers to the point where I am not in a financial position to be able to continue to pay more retainer funds. So I will be representing myself...or withdrawing the action.

I see a pending deposit. It is less than it should be which has been the consistent case but it is there!!!

Thanks to everyone for your support. I will make it one more month. Will update more later.

I see a pending deposit. It is less than it should be which has been the consistent case but it is there!!!

Thanks to everyone for your support. I will make it one more month. Will update more later.

Thank God literally the lights are still on and the mortgage is paid another month. And there is food in the fridge.

No thanks to wh. I emailed him today asking him to comply with a certain term of the judge's current order. The order tells me to get this from him. I get a flat no and an accusation that I am doing something abnormal. Nope. Normal people who are still married and want to get a divorce do things to move it forward.

Its why I no longer have a lawyer. Because this sort of stonewalling burnt up all the $$$ I had for legal bills.

And Cat. I found a process server where he is living and am working on figuring what I can file. Think it's a modification. Will try to find a self help legal group. Heard there is one here.

Same thing different month. I ask myself why. How could I ever have lives with someone who acts like this?

It's like this with every other bill as well.

I found on linked in where he is working as a sales rep while claiming no income other than disability.

I ask myself why. How could I ever have lives with someone who acts like this?

I can so relate to this.

I'm so sorry you are dealing with this. Stbx and I own some property together. I found out he let it go to collections. (Mind you, his income is two and a half times what mine is) I had to pay everything myself. My lawyer assures me I will get it back in the divorce... But I'm not so sure. There's so much of a financial mess.

Document and keep receipts for everything. Judges tend to not like men (and women) who don't support their families. Deadbeats.

If you can contact your local women's shelter, they will direct you to a pro bono legal help team member. You need to do this yesterday.

They will help you modify the terms of your order. Can you ask if they have someone who can handle communications with cheater?

I emailed him today asking him to comply with a certain term of the judge's current order.

It is NEVER good for the BS to contact cheater on these matters. Ever. Once this is legally modified, it will be between him and the legal system, not him and you. I am not sure what a lawyer would charge to send a letter when this happens, or if the pro bono connection will for you? Just the notification he is not complying and the deadline to remedy it? This communication can't come from you. It belittles the seriousness of it. Psychologically for him it is different if you go dark and all legal communications are between him and someone else. You tell him if he asks that you are no longer handling legal communications at the request of your legal team, even if it is tied to the pro bono and not full on representing you.

He is not allowed to ignore legal requirements. If he does there are legal consequences. Remember, this is not you vs him. It is the law vs him. No more texting or emailing him on this. Sorry to be so harsh but this cheater messing with BS's financially stuff boils my blood.

Take care. Sorry you are dealing with such an ass.

Duplicate.

[This message edited by Anna123 at 9:11 AM, June 13th (Sunday)]

That is a great point about the psychological of me versus the legal system.

It just seemed so much wasted time and money to fight over the small things but the disrespect just keeps piling from him and his attorney (who..you can't make this stuff up...is on the board of the local domestic violence programs)

That said, I am working on figuring out how to file for contempt and ask for perjury (longshot) and a new temporary order hearing called a de Novo

I was trying to not fight with the bio dad of my child but see no other way out now. Three years plus since I caught him cheating and still this ..

And thanks Anna it always feels good when SI folks weigh in

I think if he is not complying with the current order, you would need to file a complaint for contempt, not a modification.

A petition for modification is to change the terms of the orders currently in force.

A complaint for contempt is to petition the court for redress if the other party is found to not be complying with the current order.

Cat

Thanks Cat. It's a sort of all of the above in my "can't make this sort of stuff up" life

- not complying with the very minimal $ order first lawyer drafted in error not reflecting what the judge actually ordered (less than $150 the order tells him to pay and a few other minimal things in the actual written order)

-not complying with the written temporary order the court put in the electronic record (intent)

I am in the process of trying to figure out how to do a letter notice to the court which is how I bring this back to the Judge.

Then there is also him not complying with a series of other orders and his (victim advocate) attorney refuses to address this and even wrote an email stating he will not comply

This would have to be address by a contempt motion

Then there is him hiding employment/investment/deferred compensation in a business as well as lots of other stuff and flat out reporting stuff that is not true and his attorney doing the same.

Supposedly the Judge could award me every thing he is hiding to me

But I have no idea how to bring that back

And supposedly the Judge could rule on my case immediately. But this is a long shot.

In addition, the first hearing my attorney at the time did not include lots of bills and the commissioner gave my husband 2/3 of the marital income and both vehicles. So de Novo hearing bringing it to the Judge or asking for a modification

One thing at a time and one day at a time.

Thank you all for weighing in. You keep me going!

One day I will be free!

Just wanted to say thanks to all. I made it another month!

I figured out how to send a letter to the Judge thanks to wh's attorney.

We will see if he responds....

Are you pro se or do you have an attorney?

Cat