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Newest Member: ConstantlyConfused

New Beginnings :
Happy update!

Topic is Sleeping.
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 NeverTwice (original poster member #74421) posted at 7:19 PM on Friday, September 4th, 2020

Hi friends,

Just wanted to drop a note of positivity!

I think I found my person!!! And I think I knew it Tuesday evening. My daughter is going through some relationship struggles of her own right now with her BF of four years.

And I just sat back and watched my girlfriend!!! spend 2 solid hours talking to my daughter about her BF and life in general. And gave her both solid relationship advice - AND life advice. They have build a great rapport and I am watching my partner build a friendship with my daughter.

Hit.Me.Right.In.The.Feelz. This lady is special. Her empathy, her kind and giving nature. I have to admit it - I am falling in love with her. There - I said it.

Enough so that we had The Conversation yesterday. I had been feeling pretty guilty for hiding my finances the way I have. And, not a surprise, she completely understood.

So - my daughter is going to dog sit for us and we are headed to the beach house to do some major relaxing and continue our trip planning.

So - maybe I put a smile on someone's face today -

I certainly hope so. I am grinning from ear to ear today!

"Solid boundaries discourage trespassing." - Shirley Glass

posts: 176   ·   registered: May. 12th, 2020   ·   location: Las Tablas, Panama
id 8583510
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DevastatedDee ( member #59873) posted at 8:07 PM on Friday, September 4th, 2020

You put a smile on my face! I am pulling for you for this to work out beautifully!

Girl, you deserve this!

DDay: 06/07/2017
MH - RA on DDay.
Divorced a serial cheater (prostitutes and lord only knows who and what else).

posts: 5083   ·   registered: Jul. 27th, 2017
id 8583533
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 NeverTwice (original poster member #74421) posted at 8:52 PM on Friday, September 4th, 2020

Dee,

Thank you SO much - I feel like a giddy school girl

I met her ex-husband Monday - he came over for a cocktail and to inspect her latest beau (me!!). And I got the seal of approval it seems. You can tell they still love and care for each other a lot. And he is a gem - he kept us laughing all evening.

So I really surprised her I think. I just casually mentioned the beach and showed her the Air Bnb I had pulled up in Panama (which is actually my house). And asked her if she wanted to go on a little beach vacation.

And she was all on board! And, not gonna lie, the next part made me cry (happy tears!). When I told her it was actually my second home and wanted to share it with her - for a very long time - she broke down crying. Full on sobbing, ugly crying.

And I was terrified I had done something wrong. But, after she composed herself, she went all in. Told me that she was falling hard - and was a little scared at just how happy she was. And she has not been very good at choosing partners - before me of course! But she has been with some real pieces of work.

Soooo. I kissed her and told her I loved her and wanted to share the rest of my days with her. Then we were both crying and laughing. It was weird - in a really good way! And I am happier now than I have been for almost 3 years. Cancer takes its toll on patient and caregiver alike.

Wheeeee! It's been a hell of a ride so far!

"Solid boundaries discourage trespassing." - Shirley Glass

posts: 176   ·   registered: May. 12th, 2020   ·   location: Las Tablas, Panama
id 8583555
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WhoTheBleep ( member #49504) posted at 1:11 PM on Saturday, September 5th, 2020

Beautiful update! We need more posts like this, here. Keep your fingers crossed for the rest of us, please.

I believe we have two lives: the one we learn with, and the one we live with after that. --The Natural

posts: 4524   ·   registered: Sep. 6th, 2015   ·   location: USA
id 8583789
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twicefooled ( member #42976) posted at 3:27 PM on Saturday, September 5th, 2020

That sounds wonderful!

I envy you being able to use the L word already. The only person I ever told I love them (besides my family and close friends) was my ex. My first relationship post-divorce told me he loved me and I blanked out and said "thank you" (obviously I wasn't ready). I said it to him a few times after that but I wasn't feeling it. I'm actually nervous for the first time hearing it as I would hate to make anyone feel bad!

She sounds amazing! Isn't it awesome to see them in action and being all adult? Whew, so hot!

May 29 2021 ***reclaimed myself and decided to delete my story with my ex because I'm now 7 years free from him and mentally healthier than I've been in years.

*********When you know better, you can do better*************

posts: 492   ·   registered: Apr. 2nd, 2014
id 8583830
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newlife03 ( member #56527) posted at 5:18 PM on Saturday, September 5th, 2020

Yay!!

Me - 50
Kids 25, 22, 18
1st DDay in 2006, 2nd in 2007
D in 2009
Happily Committed to SO since 2011

posts: 657   ·   registered: Dec. 22nd, 2016   ·   location: ID
id 8583864
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 NeverTwice (original poster member #74421) posted at 6:05 PM on Sunday, September 6th, 2020

twicefooled,

She sounds amazing! Isn't it awesome to see them in action and being all adult? Whew, so hot!

LMAO! Yeah - who knew simply being a responsible adult was so freaking sexy

no - the way she handles disagreement and her sheer empathy remind SO much of my late husband. And that is a very large compliment coming from me

! Add in that my kids (and dogs! That's important!) love her to death and even my good for nothing brother loves her. And he has ALWAYS been very uncomfortable about my sexuality. So we are beginning to pack today and are going to go spend a month or so on the beach now that rainy season is ending there.

And I have a great new bikini I am dying to wear to the beach!

But, all joking aside, when we get back I am putting my house on the market and moving in with her until my house sells (and in the market here - it might last 3-4 days before selling) and then we will put her up for sale - it might 3-4 weeks to sell hers.

Then we are both going to emigrate there permanently. We will, most likely, purchase a small condo together here in the US as 'home base' and use the beach house as out FOB of sorts...to travel from and have as a welcome place to return.

Mainly because the cost of living (which is incredible low!) will, at the very least, quadruple our travel budget. For a couple with no mortgage it takes about $700-$800 for everything per month. And that gives you a VERY comfortable standard of living there.

And retirees who emigrate and bring $250K worth of assets into the country automatically get a 10-15% discount at any Panamanian business. And you get enrolled in the national health care system - which happens to be a very good one. So between that and Medicare we have the health angle covered - important at our age.

And you also get a $10K credit on importing any home items (furniture, vehicles, etc.) but we are only taking sentimental items and clothing. We are going to redecorate it together too!!! Right now it is decorated in beach rental chic.

So I am looking forward to making it our home.. And, while it would not be recognized there, I am thinking really long and hard about asking her to marry me before we leave.

And I could use some advice there. I have never proposed to anyone before! I just think it would be a really wonderful way to begin the rest of our lives together. I already know her tastes in jewelry and even have a ring I really like.

But I am not sure - new territory for me! So any and all advice welcome. Especially from the guys - who have a lot more experiencing with a proposal that I do!

"Solid boundaries discourage trespassing." - Shirley Glass

posts: 176   ·   registered: May. 12th, 2020   ·   location: Las Tablas, Panama
id 8584181
Topic is Sleeping.
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