Rocko ( member #80436) posted at 6:59 PM on Wednesday, August 5th, 2026
Read again and again DRSOOLERS advice!
You are in charge of what your future will look like, choose carefully!
Shino ( new member #86472) posted at 6:40 AM on Thursday, August 6th, 2026
Actually, it's very simple.
You'll leave her. And she can stay in her company.
You're already starting to resent her. Why make it harder for her?
Just leave and divorce her.
You can still reconcile in a few years, after you have healed and after you saw how she "behaved" in the separation and divorce process.
OhItsYou ( member #84125) posted at 5:59 PM on Thursday, August 6th, 2026
There is another option here.
Since by not immediately quitting the job, or at least asking you if you want her to quit, she’s already told you her priority list and you’re at the bottom.
So,
Do you believe the company will be worth a substantial amount in the somewhat near future? You could always just white knuckle the "marriage" until the time that it’s worth enough, then divorce her and take half of her portion of the company.
Letmebefrank ( member #86994) posted at 9:39 PM on Thursday, August 6th, 2026
If he divorces her, why couldn’t he take half of her stock/options now?
survrus ( member #67698) posted at 10:53 PM on Thursday, August 6th, 2026
Wow since Your kids financial future might depend on her success this is a tough one.
Research the OM he could be a con man who has done this before, did your WW invest family money into this startup. Possibly the OM uses affairs to blind women and steal from them.
gr8ful ( member #58180) posted at 11:43 PM on Thursday, August 6th, 2026
I’ve been in that (startup) world repeatedly. She must choose between her marriage or her startup. Co-founders work crazy hours together, usually under both exciting times and stressful conditions. Her relationship with her AP co-founder is forever MASSIVELY tainted. There’s absolutely no way for things to go back to "just friends".
That also goes to you OP. Unfortunately you must also choose between a CHANCE at R (someday) or the (statistically smaller) chance of landing a payout from an eventual exit. If you choose the cash route (your wife stays with the startup), know that you cannot get there with a truly healed marriage. If she’s still working closely with her co-founder, which she absolutely must, the infidelity continues, whether it’s "physical" or not anymore. What’s truly sad is that your either/or have something in common: not-great odds of succeeding, whether it be a truly healed & happy marriage or a startup landing a big exit.
You still must and can choose only one. Sucks she put you in this position.
